Obama Schoolkids Speech Hilarity

Andy Ostroy posted his own version of President Obama's September 8 speech to schoolkids at Huffington Post. It is a very witty piece of political humor. I have put it up in its entirety.

"The White House on Monday released the text of President Barack Obama's highly controversial speech to the nation's school children Tuesday. As expected and feared by those on the right, the speech, I'm embarrassed to say, is truly shameful and full of dangerous radical views.

Here it is:

'Hello children, both Democrats and those whose parents belong to that less desirable party. Today is a very big day for you. Your first day back to school. I hope you enjoyed your Summer vacation. I tried to enjoy mine, but certain members of an un-named right-wing political party have made the past two months a living hell for me. But this isn't about me, so let's discuss why I've decided to talk with you today.

Education. It's the backbone and foundation of our society. It's what makes America great. And you as young school children represent America's future. It's important that you study hard, set goals and expand your horizons...and most importantly, that you desperately try to convince your Republican parents that they are 100% wrong about every domestic issue from taxes to health care reform to abortion, gun control and gay marriage. But I digress...

Each and every one of you has the same ability to succeed in life no matter what obstacles you face. If your family is poor, you can still go to college...unless of course the Republican Party, should it ever return to power, completely guts Pell Grants, student loans and other tuition-assistance programs.

Yes, you are our future. We need your collective brainpower. We need you to find a cure for aids and cancer. We need you to protect the environment by helping to develop alternative energy sources, green jobs and other environmental protections...because the Republican Party refuses to accept that global warming exists, and only cares about protecting oil companies and corporate polluters.

And since you asked, let's talk health care reform. Many of your parents would like you to believe that my "public option" package would kill your grannies. You march right into your living rooms tonight and tell your parents they're full of shit! Just like that. And tell 'em Uncle Barack said so. Trust me kids, if anyone's lying here, it's mommy and daddy. And another thing, if there's a political party that cares about the old, the poor, the sick, the hungry, veterans and puppies, it ain't the Republicans. Republicans wanna kill puppies!

Now the last thing I'd like to discuss with you is the need for you to get involved. Care about your community, your city, your state, your country. Even me, your president. Ask how you can help. How you can support what I'm trying to do to fix the economy, end our two wars and get America back to being the greatest nation in the world. But I can't do it alone. I need you to join the Young Democrats Club. Visit our website. Go to meetings. Wear our uniform. Learn our secret handshake. We're the fun party! And we're smart, too. C'mon, we both know that any party who sees Sarah Palin as their future, well, that's pretty dang scary, right?

So go home, tell mommy and daddy that we had a simple little chat today, and that everything's ok. Then help me in this revolution! Watch your email for further information.

Good day kids, and God bless (I say "God" with a wink because, as everyone knows, I'm a God-less communist/socialist/fascist/Muslim terrorist who hates Jesus and America).

Have fun at lunch!' President Obama"

The REAL text, posted by the White House, is here. Enjoy.

Media Pandering Revealed in the Wake of the Blagojevich Mess

Gawker has a fascinating post up detailing the lengths the mainstream media went to book embattled Governor Rod Blagojevich and his wife on their programs at the height of the scandal that resulted in his impeachment and removal as Governor of Illinois. Gawker used the FOIA process to reveal the great lengths the media would go to book the Gov:

"On the morning he was arrested on corruption charges last December, Rod Blagojevich was the nation's biggest greaseball. So obviously, the national press was willing to say anything to land an interview. And we've got their emails to prove it. We reported a little over a month ago that the Today show had booked Blagojevich to appear on the morning he happened to be arrested by the FBI, but bumped the interview so they could flack for Jay Leno's new show. We found that out through a Freedom of Information Act request to the state of Illinois asking for e-mails from representatives of the media to Lucio Guerrero, Blagojevich's press secretary."

The results are very revealing...and probably embarrassing to the authors of the emails. My personal favorite is the one below--short, sweet, and to the point...

Hat Tip: Political Wire

Traficant Out of the Pokey, Comes Home to a Hero's Welcome

After seven long years in federal prison, James Traficant, the former Congressman with the crazy toupee from Ohio's Mahoning Valley, is home. Not only is he home, he came home to a hero's welcome--1200 fans of the eccentric politico showed up to see their hero.

"'I was a quarterback. I was a congressman. Now I'm a convict,' Traficant said, his signature toupee firmly back atop his head. 'I wouldn't change one single thing. And to the powerful enemies that I have, I'll just say this to you: They had to cheat to convict me.' At times it was hard to tell if Traficant was joking or lashing out. He warned the crowd that agents from the FBI and IRS were probably in the parking lot taking down license plate numbers, to which the crowd laughed. They then grew serious when he said Northeast Ohio had to start changing the country, because so many others are afraid to stand up to the government. 'I think it's time to tell the FBI and the IRS that this is our country and we're tired -- tired of the pressure, tired of the political targeting, tired of a powerful central government that is crippling America,' he said."

"In 2002, in a trial in which Traficant represented himself, he was convicted of 10 felony counts, including accepting bribes and taking kickbacks. Prosecutors and witnesses said he filed false tax returns and accepted free labor and materials for his Ohio farm from contractors in exchange for giving them congressional favors. He was the second House member since the Civil War to be voted out for unethical behavior. Traficant, whose speeches in Congress often drew a crowd because they were so colorful and unusual, frequently made Star Trek references and, on the House floor, signed off by saying, 'Beam me up.'"

It will be fun to watch what he does next. My guess is he will not opt for a quiet retirement...

Obama's Upcoming Address to Schoolkids Creating Faux Controversy

Why would President Barack Obama's address to the nation's schoolkids be controversial? It is so controversial a number of schools are opting out and outraged parents are putting pressure on them to do so. It shouldn't be. He is after all the president. He occupies an office that until recently was held in high regard by all Americans. It doesn't matter who the president is--Democrat or Republican, liberal or conservative, Obama or Bush--he is the president and an address to the nation's schoolkids should be welcomed not criticized.

I remember going to school and having the pictures of the presidents hanging on the wall. Not pictures with Hitler moustaches drawn on them or devil eyes like we've seen the wingnut crowd do recently. Just their portraits. They were given the respect they were due.

The faux controversy over the presidents address to school kids is just that--a controversy created by wingnut talk radio and bought into by a hyper-conspiratorial and ill-informed American public. This is just the latest example that many in the American public have lost their mind.

The "Birther" Crazies are Winning in Arkansas

We know that Arkansas consistently ranks in the bottom half with regards to public schools. Thus it comes as no surprise that only 45% of Arkansans believe that President Barack Obama was born in the United States while 55% believe that he wasn't or are "not sure" if he was. The birther crazies are winning in Arkansas.

I've already written on this topic and probably will again but the level of paranoia, fear, and ignorance in the United States is stunning. Newsflash America: your president is black and has an unusual name. He was born in Hawaii. He's an American and he's your president. Deal with it.

Hat Tip: Political Wire

The Great Philosophical Divide in the Health Care Reform Debate

Senator Jim DeMint (R-SC) crystallized the health care debate when he intoned that "I think health care is a privilege. I wouldn't call it a right. ... I do think in our country and in any civil society there should be a safety net for basic health and food and shelter, but that doesn't mean that the whole system should be designed around the belief that people can't make their own decisions, can't be responsible for themselves."

This statement reflects the basic difference of philosophy between most Liberals and Conservatives, Democrats and Republicans. Democrats and Liberals view health care as a right, Republicans and Conservatives view it as a privilege. This overarching disagreement is at the heart of what has plagued attempts to reform the health care system for decades.

Perhaps it is the ideological difference in interpretation of the words in the Declaration of Independence: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: That all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights; that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." Whether or not someone believes health care is incorporated in this phrase probably goes a long way to determining their stand in this debate.

Dancing With DeLay

Dancing With the Stars announced its lineup for Season 9 and former Republican Majority Leader Tom DeLay (R-TX) is among them. Yup. Tom DeLay. The only politico that would have surprised me more is former Speaker Dennis Hastert *R-IL).

DeLay joins a celebrity cast which includes: singers Mya, Macy Gray and Aaron Carter; actors Ashley Hamilton, Melissa Joan Hart and Debi Mazar; models Joanna Krupa and Kathy Ireland; reality stars Mark Dacascos and Kelly Osbourne; entertainer Donny Osmond; mixed martial artist Chuck Liddell; professional snowboarder Louie Vito; Olympic swimmer Natalie Coughlin; and former Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Michael Irvin.

I've never been a big fan of the show but I may have to tune in from time-to-time to watch this season...

Brett Favre, Huckster

Huckster: "a cheaply mercenary person"

Yes, I know this blog is about politics but as the creater/owner/CEO I have license to digress. And, as a lifetime Green Bay Packer fan I have a responsibility to write on the following topic: Brett Favre. For many years, wise friends tried to tell me that Favre was a prima donna--a spotlight-craving diva. I always poo-pooed them. I was sucked in by the awe-shucks, wrangler-wearing, John Deere mower-riding good ol' boy from Kiln, Mississippi who was born to heave the pig.

Those days are over. Favre has committed treason for reasons of revenge and money. He has signed with the Minnesota Vikings. But I fret not. I am glad. Green Bay will visit Minnesota October 5. It will be great sports theater. Minnesota's offensive line had better construct an iron curtain around the 39 year old diva because the Packers will be out for blood. And with every sack I will cheer. He is the hero no more. A huckster has arisen in his place.

The Vacationing President

CBS News' Washington Unplugged has a 15 minute segment on the history of modern presidents and their vacation habits. It's a cool watch.

Interesting tidbit: President George H.W. Bush could play 18 holes of golf in 90 minutes. If true, that's almost unheard of. I wonder what his average score was.


Watch CBS Videos Online

Hat Tip: Political Wire

John Quincy Adams, Tweeter

Did John Quincy Adams tweet? Well, no, but his short diary entries sure look like tweets. Now the Massachusetts Historical Society is broadcasting those diary entries as tweets, day-by-day, exactly 200 years after Adams embarked on a trip to Russia.

From MHS: "Beginning on 5 August 2009, we'll be posting JQA's line-a-day diary entries on Twitter, one per day exactly 200 years later....If you use Twitter too we hope you'll follow along and receive the daily updates. We'll be posting JQA's exact words (his entries really do work perfectly as 140-character tweets), and where possible we will augment the posts with maps showing his location (thank him for providing regular latitude and longitude readings), links to longer diary entries, and other information. His short entries are surprisingly rich, full of wonderful details about his reading, meals, weather, and shipboard activities."

For more info, check here.

Hat Tip to a faithful reader who chirped to me about this story.

FLOTUS Fashion

If you like fashion and you like First Lady Michelle Obama, the website "Mrs. O" is for you. The "site hopes to be a central, ever evolving resource to chronicle Mrs.O’s look, while providing fashion commentary and information." (Hat Tip: American Presidents Blog)

Another Mrs. Obama fashion watcher is: Michelle O. Style

I'm not a fashionista, but for those who are, you will probably be ga-ga over these sites. Enjoy.

Additional NYC Air Force One Flyover Pictures Released

Yes, that flyover. You remember when the DoD and the Director of the White House Military Office thought it was a good idea to have Air Force One flying really low over the New York City skyline a few months ago so they could snap a few pictures. Well, because of a Freedom of Information Act request, you can the photo shot by the military jets accompanying Air Force One.

According to The Caucus: "The Pentagon released the full set of 146 photographs in response to Freedom of Information requests, it seems. Around photo 82, the jet begins flying over the Statue of Liberty, and then later, does a return rip above the landmark. The Defense Department also released a redacted flight manifest, which, frankly, doesn’t tell you much. The flyover rumbled lower Manhattan, prompting building evacuations in a stark reminder of the airplane attacks of Sept. 11, 2001. And it later forced the resignation of Louis Caldera, who was the director of the White House Military Office. President Obama himself apologized for the fear factor generated by the plane’s — and its two fighter jet escorts’ — jaunt over a jittery New York populace."

The photos are available here.